"my choice...pain"
emotional pain with physical pain...
manifestation...
no one can ease it...
no one can erase it...
no drug can calm it...
I cant even ignore it...
only time...will heal it...
my chest aches...throbs...hurts
covered in scratches and bruises...
scabs...
above my heart...how convenient...
this path to pain leads no where that I can see...
it's a path to more pain...
"sweet surrender"
sacrificing my body
a canvass for your pleasure
offering my body
as an instrument to play with
I feel the pain
of your fingernails
the slow burning sensation
above my heart
tears well up in my eyes
a lump builds in my throat
where there was blood
there are now scars
a permanent reminder
..of the sacrifice
...of the intimacy
...of the injection of your soul into me
a sweet surrender
"crush"
she crushes my chest
with the weight of her soul
a breath...not possible
inhaling...hurts
to exhale...creates fear
my breath...less and less
as I lose, more and more
my chest...smaller
my lungs...collapsed
my emotions...pushed out
all beyond my will
it brings up a memory
of similar pain
of longing for you
like I long to breathe, again